Father's Day Adoption


Dear Dad,

There is no other way to say it; you are the best dad in the entire world. We all want to wish you a wonderful, Happy Father’s Day!

...Now, you don’t remember this because it was so long ago, but back when we were school age, we actually adopted you. That’s right,
we adopted you.

Mom was at the hospital picking up her methadone one day when she found you...

Since our real dad, a no-good, drug-dealing pimp called Dooby White Shoes, abandoned us shortly after we were born, we needed a father...

Now you know the truth. It’s all on the table. And, we love you more and more each day. So, go have another helping of sauerkraut and Jiffy, compliments of Dr. Gaveislstenstriker, put your feet up, and have a wonderful Father’s Day!